Big Emotions That Feel Hard to Manage
Learn how to understand, regulate, and move through overwhelming emotions using DBT skills. Serving children, teens, and adults across Long Island and New York City.
Sometimes emotions don’t just show up, they surge. You might feel overwhelmed by sadness, anxiety, anger, shame, or fear in ways that seem stronger than the situation calls for. You may cry easily, shut down, lash out, or feel emotionally flooded for hours or days.
This isn’t a character flaw. It’s often a sign that your nervous system reacts quickly and intensely to emotional triggers.
At Suffolk DBT, we help children, teens, and adults across Long Island and New York City understand these emotional patterns and build skills to regulate emotions, increase stability, and navigate feelings without being controlled by them. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) provides practical tools to create a life that feels more manageable.
What These Moments Can Look Like
Emotional Dysregulation can show up in many ways, including:
Feeling emotions more intensely than others seem to
Mood swings that feel sudden or confusing
Crying spells or emotional shutdown
Anger that rises quickly or feels hard to control
Trouble calming down once you’re upset
Shame that lingers long after a situation ends
These reactions are not about being “too sensitive.” They are often signs that your emotional system is working overtime and needs better tools for regulation and recovery.
Emotional dysregulation is one part of a broader pattern of dysregulation that can affect emotions, thoughts, behaviors, relationships, and sense of self. When we understand how these pieces connect, change becomes possible.
Conditions Often Linked to Intense or Overwhelming Emotions
DBT can be helpful even if you don’t have a formal diagnosis. The Dialectical Behavior Therapy skills focus on the emotional patterns and reactions themselves — helping you respond more effectively and build stability over time.
Completing Behavioral Chains Together:
We’re always asking:
What keeps this cycle going and what skills will help you break it?
This work is thoughtful, practical, and based on research.
And just as important: your struggles are not your fault. There are reasons these patterns developed, and there are tools that can help you change them.
This level of real-time support is a defining feature of adherent DBT, setting it apart from other therapy approaches.
In DBT, change happens through learning and practicing concrete skills in the moments they are needed most. Rather than focusing only on insight or past experiences, the work centers on what helps you cope more effectively right now—especially during intense emotions, relationship conflicts, or moments of overwhelm.
Support is active and collaborative. Skills are reinforced in real time, challenges are explored without judgment, and setbacks are treated as opportunities to refine what works. Over time, this approach helps build emotional stability, healthier relationships, and a stronger sense of agency in daily life.
How DBT Helps You Gain Control
Mindfulness helps you pause, notice what’s happening inside, and create space between feelings and actions. Over time, with practice, you develop the ability to notice thoughts, emotions, and body sensations as they arise instead of being automatically driven by them. This growing awareness gives you more choice in how you respond, rather than reacting on autopilot.
These skills help you survive intense emotional waves without making things worse. You learn ways to calm your body, ground yourself, and safely ride out overwhelming feelings during difficult moments.
Distress tolerance isn’t about making pain disappear right away it’s about getting through a crisis safely until you’re able to problem-solve. And you don’t have to do it alone your therapist is there to help you use these tools when you need them most
When emotions run high, it’s easy to say things you don’t mean, shut down, or damage relationships. DBT teaches you clear, step-by-step scripts for:
- Asking for what you need
- Saying no
- Expressing feelings without attacking
- Setting boundaries
- Repairing relationships after conflict
These tools help reduce emotional vulnerability over time so reactions feel less intense and more manageable. You learn to recognize and understand different emotions, decide whether acting on them will be effective, and choose what to do next. When helpful, you practice problem-solving or using opposite action to gently shift emotional patterns in healthier ways.
Our Full DBT Program Includes
DBT is a comprehensive program designed to support change both inside and outside of therapy sessions.
In weekly sessions, you and your therapist review your diary card together and focus on the goals that matter most to you building a life that feels more stable, meaningful, and worth living.
The diary card helps you become more aware of your emotions, urges, and behaviors, especially the patterns that may be getting in the way of the life you want.
Then we review homework — how you practiced your skills during the week and introduce new tools to help you manage emotions, relationships, and stressful situations.The focus isn’t on rehashing problems it’s on building solutions and learning practical ways to handle challenges more effectively.
The goal isn’t to provide therapy over the phone, but to help you practice responding in skillful ways so you can handle challenges with more confidence and control.
Our therapists are supported by a DBT consultation team to provide high-quality, structured care “You are not expected to figure this out alone”
DBT Programs for Different Ages and Life Stages
Younger children often show impulsive behavior through big emotions.They may have trouble calming down or following directions when they feel overwhelmed. DBT-C involves both the child and their caregivers.
Children learn emotion and behavior skills, while parents learn how to respond in supportive, effective ways.
Teens often experience emotions intensely and may feel overwhelmed by mood swings, reactivity, or emotional shutdown.
Within our DBT-A program, teens learn practical skills to understand their emotions, calm their bodies, and respond more thoughtfully instead of reacting in the moment. At the same time, caregivers learn how to support skill use at home, helping reduce emotional escalation and build more stability over time.
This stage of life brings more independence and pressure, which can make impulsive choices more likely when emotions run high, such as substance use, skipping classes, or sudden decisions about relationships or school.
DBT helps young adults slow down, tolerate distress, and make more intentional choices while managing relationships, school, work, and daily life with greater steadiness.
Adults with emotion regulation difficulties may struggle with relationship conflict, work stress, parenting challenges, or long-standing emotional patterns. Strong emotions can feel overwhelming and may drive quick reactions or emotional shutdown.
DBT helps adults understand their emotions, reduce emotional intensity, and respond more thoughtfully in ways that align with their values and long-term goals.
DBT skills can make a meaningful difference at any age. Because emotional and behavioral challenges show up differently across development, our programs are tailored to support children, teens, young adults, and adults in ways that fit their stage of life.
What starts to change?
With Time and Practice, many people in DBT notice:
Change doesn’t happen overnight. But it does happen
You’re Not “Too Much.” Your Nervous System Needs Skills.
If you often feel like your emotions take over before you can think, DBT can help you slow those moments down, feel more in control, and build safer, more effective ways to cope.
You don’t have to keep living in reaction mode.
Where We Offer DBT Therapy
In-Person DBT Therapy
We provide Dialectical Behavior Therapy at our offices in Mount Sinai, Babylon, Roslyn Heights, and New York City.
Online DBT Therapy
Secure telehealth DBT available across New York, including Upstate.
GET STARTED TODAY
Ready to Get Started and speak with an Intake Specialist?
You don’t have to keep feeling overwhelmed by your emotions.
With the right support and skills, things really can feel more manageable.
Completely confidential. Only takes 10-15 minutes.
