Reaching an advanced age is a feat to celebrate for some and a process to fear for others. What makes some people develop a fear of aging? In a society where older people face varying disempowerment, they may anticipate poorer health and finances and decreased independence in older age. Such thoughts about the future and the reality of mortality can ultimately leave them feeling depressed about aging.
At Suffolk DBT, we’re dedicated to providing compassion, understanding, and support to individuals—no matter their age. We’re here to help if you’re struggling with how to stop thinking about death and dying and overcome other mental and emotional challenges that often accompany aging and depression.
With the right support and skills learned in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), you can turn the challenges of aging into opportunities for growth and peace.
Aging and depression
Aging can be depressing for some in a society that generally makes you retire when you reach a certain age and that often under-invests in retirement and nursing homes. Beyond that is the basic reality that depression in older adults is often unseen and unrecognized. Depression in older adults is more common than many realize, with statistics showing that an estimated four percent of older individuals in the U.S. aged 70 and up have depression.
What can depression in aging adults be like?
- Lack of motivation and energy
- Problems with memory and sleep patterns
- Skipping meals and neglecting personal hygiene and care
- Worrying about burdening others
- Suicidal thoughts and a fixation on death
Many older adults often don’t recognize their depression symptoms nor do they want to “burden” others with their constantly changing emotions and feelings.
Address your struggles with aging and depression with DBT
Feeling depressed about aging and experiencing sadness, despair, grief, or loss can make it challenging to see the beauty in life’s later years. But you don’t have to stay depressed and fearful of aging for the rest of your life.
At Suffolk DBT, we approach the negative feelings stemming from the intersection of aging and depression with warmth and empathy, guiding you in emotional regulation and new ways to connect with your self-worth and sense of purpose.
Maximizing mental wellness in aging
As you age and thoughts of death become more prominent, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, leading to increased anxiety, sadness, and depression about aging.
When you’re ready to focus on your mental and emotional health and make decisions like seeking therapy and professional support and care, you’re building resilience that gives you the strength to confront how to stop thinking about death and dying without letting such thoughts take over your life.
Learning how to nurture your mind and spirit in our DBT sessions helps you create a foundation for more fulfilling later years in which you experience:
- Preserved cognitive abilities
- Mood improvements
- Decreased feelings of isolation
- More effective, mindful coping strategies for handling grief and loss
- Social interactions and relationships you can make the most of and enjoy
How DBT supports aging and depression
Originally developed to treat borderline personality disorder, DBT has since demonstrated effectiveness in addressing a range of emotional and psychological issues, including depression, anxiety, and overwhelming emotions that can arise in later life.
DBT is a skills-based therapy that focuses on four key areas
- Mindfulness
- Emotional regulation
- Distress tolerance
- Interpersonal effectiveness
Each of these skills can empower aging adults to handle depression about aging and the distress that comes with thoughts like how to stop thinking about death and dying by empowering them to stay grounded in the present, cope with difficult emotions, and maintain positive relationships.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness helps you stay in touch with the present moment. This skill allows you to experience life as it happens rather than getting lost in worries about the future or regrets about the past.
This practice can be beneficial for managing the fear of aging by focusing your attention on what you can control and enjoy right now. Try being gentle with yourself in the present by taking a few minutes each day to focus on your breathing, surroundings, or an activity you enjoy.
Emotional Regulation
Emotional regulation teaches you how to manage intense feelings healthily. As you age, it’s common to experience ups and downs in your mood, but DBT can help you respond to these emotions with greater calm and control, reducing feelings of depression.
Distress Tolerance
Distress tolerance is a skill that helps you navigate difficult situations or thoughts, such as persistent thoughts about death and dying and equally persistent thoughts about how to stop thinking about death and dying, without being overwhelmed.
This skill helps build resilience and allows you to cope with life’s challenges without turning to harmful behaviors. Try combining this skill with mindfulness by writing down your fears about aging and how it makes you feel. Such journaling helps you gain clarity and allows you to reflect on your feelings and thoughts and how you might approach them compassionately.
Interpersonal Effectiveness
Interpersonal effectiveness focuses on maintaining healthy relationships. Social dynamics with your family and friends are likely to change in older age, but they don’t have to be negative changes.
Knowing how to communicate effectively, ask for what you need, and perceive the feelings and needs of others can help reduce feelings of loneliness and isolation.
Embrace aging with compassion and support at Suffolk DBT
One of the most important parts of addressing aging and depression is knowing you don’t have to face it alone.
Therapy offers a safe and supportive environment to explore the complex emotions and thoughts that come with aging. If you’re feeling depressed about aging or are struggling with thoughts about death, working with one of our trained DBT therapists can make a significant difference in how you manage and overcome these feelings.
Our compassionate team on Long Island and in New York City is here to provide the guidance and support you need. We understand that therapy isn’t just about treating problems, but about giving you tools to thrive, find peace, and live your later years with confidence and connection. Together, we’ll help you work through your fear of aging, ease your mind, and embrace the present with greater joy and fulfillment.