We all know that eating disorders are a thing. But most of us act as if it is something that happens to other people and other families. You hear stories about terrible struggles. You know the numbers are growing. But not for people you love, right?
Close to 30 million Americans will have an eating disorder in their lifetime. That’s a lot of people, but still, you might never take the time to learn more. At least not until it is right in your face, with a loved one struggling with the pain of an eating disorder.
Then again, eating disorders are not always obvious. The signs can be subtle. It’s entirely possible you’ve missed signs of an eating disorder in people you already know.
If you suspect that someone in your life is struggling, it is essential to educate yourself. The eating disorder treatment experts at Suffolk DBT on Long Island and Manhattan are here to help.
Eating Disorders: The Basics
An eating disorder is both a mental and physical condition. It can involve extreme restriction of intake and/or overeating, as well as purging. The three most common forms of eating disorder are:
- Anorexia nervosa: The hallmark is the severe restriction of one’s food intake.
- Bulimia nervosa: This presents as binge eating, then compensating for the bingeing through behaviors like vomiting or obsessive exercise.
- Binge-eating disorder: A person with this variation may lose control over their own eating choices. This often manifests as consuming huge quantities of food.
Subtle Signs Your Loved One May Have an Eating Disorder
When Eating, Your Loved One May:
- Be very particular about which utensils they use (this could involve using children-sized utensils or plates)
- Insist on specific serving sizes, e.g. counting how many blueberries they add to their cereal
- Eat unusual combinations of food
When Not Eating, Your Loved One May:
- Spend a lot of time researching food ingredients and scrutinizing food labels when shopping
- Read cookbooks, watch recipe videos, and meticulously adjust those recipes to match their food rules
- Show extreme curiosity about what others are eating or have eaten in the past
- Hoard food-related items, e.g. takeout packets of ketchup
- Comment regularly on other peoples’ eating behaviors or appearance
- Repeatedly check their appearance in mirrors, cameras, etc.
Your Loved One May Create Unusual Food “Rules” Like:
- Planning meals based on the expiration date of certain foods
- Wearing certain clothes or accessories when eating
- Purposely over-cooking or under-cooking their food
You can see that there’s much more to eating disorders than how they’re shown in pop culture. If someone close to you displays some variation of the above, they may need some help. One approach that has shown great results is dialectical behavior therapy (DBT).
How Can DBT Help with disordered eating?
How Can DBT Help with disordered eating?DBT is very effective at helping people balance emotions in a helpful way. Part of this process involves addressing your current behaviors in times of stress.
An eating disorder isn’t just about eating. It can emerge when a person attempts to regulate emotions through eating choices. The core of the disorder is overwhelming emotions and upsetting thoughts that end up tied to food as an outlet.
Obviously, since DBT is effective in helping people to regulate their emotions, as treatment for eating disorders it can be a good match.
When working with a DBT therapist in Long Island, someone with an eating disorder will be guided through these four skills areas:
Mindfulness
Being more present in the moment is a crucial skill when dealing with disorder eating. This kind of self-awareness makes one’s behaviors more clear, and turns down the volume on worries, making it easier to focus on nourishing yourself.
Distress Tolerance
Distress can trigger an eating disorder as a faulty coping choice. DBT teaches you how to deal with distressing feelings in healthier ways.
Interpersonal Effectiveness
It is not unusual for someone to slip into eating problems as a method of reclaiming control, and this can seep into their personal relationships as well. With the help of a skilled DBT therapist, they can develop productive methods to:
- Set boundaries
- Express needs
- Build healthy relationships
Emotion Regulation
We come back to this important skill. Thanks to DBT, your loved one with an eating disorder can learn new approaches to regulating their emotions. They can learn to name them, can work on reducing their vulnerability to emotional overwhelm, and can learn ways to regulate in the moment so emotional overwhelm doesn’t push them toward disordered eating.
DBT is a powerful tool for recovery. Let’s set up a free consultation. I’d love to talk more with you and your loved one about this approach.
Click here for more information on Manhattan and Long Island Eating Disorder Treatment. At Suffolk DBT, we offer eating disorder treatment on Long Island, Manhattan, and online.
Suffolk DBT proudly provides quality dialectical behavior therapy, a form of cognitive behavioral therapy, at their offices in Manhattan and Long Island, New York and online. Their experienced therapists specialize in serving teens, children, adults, and college students struggling with depression, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, and self-harm. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) skills and treatment can help you or your kids to manage emotions and work through life’s challenges. Suffolk DBT Manhattan and Long Island offer a free screening call so you can get started right away.
Frequently Asked Questions About DBT for Eating Disorders
Eating disorders are much more complicated than just not eating enough.
A preoccupation with appearance, size, exercise, and food intake is often brushed off as just vanity, but eating disorders are mostly about underlying emotions and thoughts that drive disordered behaviors.
When someone is totally overwhelmed and feels out of control, food and exercise are some of the few things they can control on their own. If you just encourage people with disordered eating to eat differently, that's treating a symptom, not a cause.
DBT for eating disorders helps you manage the root cause of the disordered eating, giving you the tools you need to adjust eating behaviors while also finding a constructive outlet for your emotions.
It's hard to know how to invite your loved one to open up about their disordered eating. You may worry they'll be upset, push back and disagree that they have a problem, or stop sharing with you.
The best way to encourage someone to open up is through validation and listening first, problem-solving second. Go into the conversation ready to listen, not to insist on treatment. Ask open-ended questions about stress, how they're feeling, or by sharing you've noticed changes and wanted to ask about them. Let them know you're there for them and you're listening.
This process may take multiple attempts before your loved one opens up to you, but with caring persistence and careful, considerate questions that let your loved one talk, you can make progress in getting them to consider reaching out for help.