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SheKnows: Self-Harm in Teens: What Parents Need to Know and How to Help a Child Who Is Hurting

Suffolk DBT’s founder, Jeanette Lorandini, was featured in a recent article offering support and guidance to parents who have a teen who is self-harming. She provides thoughtful context and helpful ideas for parents who don’t know where to turn.

Excerpts from the article:

Jeanette Lorandini, LCSW, a psychotherapist and founder of Suffolk DBT, a therapy practice serving families across Long Island and New York City, says this misunderstanding is common. “In my clinical work with adolescents, self-harm is often misunderstood,” Lorandini says. “Most teens who engage in self-injury are not trying to die; they’re trying to cope. It’s usually a way to release overwhelming emotional pain or regulate feelings that feel too intense to manage.”

Why Teens Sometimes Turn to Self-injury

Adolescence is already an emotionally intense period, and not every teen has the tools to handle those feelings yet. “Teenagers often experience emotions very intensely, but many haven’t yet developed the skills to manage those feelings,” Lorandini says. “Self-harm can become a maladaptive coping strategy when emotions feel too big, too fast, or too confusing to handle.”

Why Professional Help Matters

Even if a teen insists the behavior is “not a big deal,” experts say self-harm should always be taken seriously. It is often a signal that a child needs support coping with emotional pain.

Therapies like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can be especially effective. “DBT teaches teens practical skills to regulate emotions, tolerate distress, and navigate difficult situations without harming themselves,” Lorandini says.

At her practice, families are often involved in treatment as well. “In multi-family groups, parents learn the same skills their teen is using,” she explains. “Parents learn to regulate and so do their teens. It’s powerful to see the family environment shift together.”

You can read the article here!

Suffolk DBT proudly provides quality dialectical behavior therapy, a form of cognitive behavioral therapy, at their offices in Manhattan and Long Island, New York and online. Their experienced therapists specialize in serving teens, children, adults, and college students struggling with depression, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, and self-harm. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) skills and treatment can help you or your kids to manage emotions and work through life’s challenges. Suffolk DBT Manhattan and Long Island offer a free screening call so you can get started right away.

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Suffolk DBT proudly provides quality dialectical behavior therapy, a form of cognitive behavioral therapy, at their offices in Manhattan and Long Island, New York and online. Their experienced NYC counselors specialize in serving teens, children, adults, and college students struggling with depression, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, and self-harm. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) skills and treatment can help you to manage emotions and work through life’s challenges.

Completely confidential. Only takes 10-15 minutes.